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How not to deplete yourself in three words

The first word is YOU.

This will be included in pretty much EVERYTHING I say to you. Put yourself first! Think of all the times when you have nothing left to give but others are still needing you to produce, give or perform at 80% or better. Well, your job wants 100%. Your family 80%. My husband and children have the “It’s okay” look when I need it, but they still want dinner. I’ve gotten completely comfortable with saying, “Give me a minute. I need a break.” They understand what that means, and they give me my space. I emerge replenished, then I carry on. You know, the best action after is when a child of mine runs up to me with the brightest “MOMMY!” Arms wide open. It’s like they were just waiting for my battery to recharge like their tablet. I think sometimes they think I am their personal tablet. “Mommy play this game with me, Mommy read this book to me, Mommy I’m hungry.” LOL. Maybe you don’t have children, maybe your spouse’s or partner’s eyes light up when you reappear alive and vibrant. Maybe it’s your pet. Trust me someone or something notices when your energy is back and even though they too are back to wanting and needing from you two things are also happening. One, you have the energy to accomplish more, tackle the most important things and leave the rest for later or better yet someone else. Yes, with more energy you can think clearer so you can delegate tasks more efficiently and not burden yourself with to-do lists. Two, you feel better, don’t you? The second word is BOUNDARIES. If you don’t have one, get one or several. People are draining. Covid-19 is draining. Staying confined to the house is draining yet none of these things should be leading you to a drought. You can only take so much. When you’ve had enough of people, the pandemic and whatever else, it’s time to step away and find some peace. These things are actual distractions and take you away from experiencing inner joy. Leave them and get connected to your heart’s passions. Let your desires be your go-to as often as necessary. Your health and well-being depend on it. When those distractions emerge or try to attach themselves to you, if you haven’t already, understand that there’s power in saying NO. No is powerful for you when you’ve had enough and genuinely need to be alone with your thoughts and to fulfill your needs. And it’s okay if others don’t understand why. Simply respond with, “Well if it was you, I’d be okay if you told me no because I understand that everybody needs time to themselves.” The final word is BALANCE. You put a lot of energy into some things and not enough into others. You pour your energy into a j-o-b understandably so because that’s how you make a living, or make ends meet, then there’s usually not much energy left for you. Not for your interests, your hobbies, the new thing, new gig, new business, or new relationship you really want to pursue. Over time when you don’t put the time into personal dreams and goals you become used up, depleted.

When people tell me that they’re working so hard at something they really don’t like but it’s paying the bills, I remind them that if something was to happen to them that job is not going to retire their jersey number. Imagine what you can get done when your energy is replenished. Balance what you have to do with what you want to do. YOU need BOUNDARIES and BALANCE to have more energy, live in the moment, and say farewell to being overwhelmed. 🧡 Tanesha

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